Finally Settled In

After being at Organization X for about 2 months now, I finally feel like I have my bearings. For the most part, I know what to expect as far as my schedule, the girls, and my coworkers. I'm working hard, but I'm not overwhelmed or overly stressed because I know the drill now.

Not only do I end my days feeling calmer, I also feel like I'm doing a good job! I'm keeping tabs on the girls and what's going on in each of their lives and classes. I think they're feeling more comfortable around me. Yesterday, Michelle, one of the ones I feel like I know the least, approached me with a funny story about something that happened to her. Also yesterday, I had a lengthy conversation with Gloria about writing, and she let me read a bunch of her poetry! Then today she came to me for advice about a story. That meant a LOT to me because to me, at least, writing is really personal. Nina even helped me sweep the dining room (Nina voluntarily doing chores?? That's just crazy talk) and gave me a huge hug.

When I first came to Organization X, Maya gave me a talk about being firm with the girls, saying "Don't smile until December." While I appreciate her advice, I think my approach of building connections with the girls works, too. I still enforce rules and hold them accountable for chores (maybe not quite as effectively as the other houseparents, but I do do it). But I think it's hard for people to listen to an authority figure if they don't know that that authority figure cares about them, respects them and is on their team.

I'm not putting down my houseparents' houseparenting style, at all. They are great at what they do. But, after all, I have a different role than they do. It is not really my job to enforce rules and punishments and check chores (although of course I do those things in order to help the household run more smoothly). My primary role is to support the girls in school. And I think the best thing I can do to help with that is building a connection with them. That way they know I'm checking up on them and will be disappointed if they do poorly. I also want them to show them I believe in them, which (I hope) will help them believe in themselves.

--RO